With only two days left of my five days off, I decided to waste some time at Garden City shopping centre in Booragoon. 

The trip included a pick up from Dusk, aimlessly browsing around K Mart, a small grocery shop at Coles and the restocking of the booze supplies from Liquorland. 

I picked up the Dusk purchase first and headed to K Mart where I bought a couple of dirt cheap CDs , a pair of shorts and 3 tee shirts. 

After this, I meandered around the arcades, slowly working my way towards Coles and the adjoining Liquorland. I was meant to find something for my birthday but nothing reached out and grabbed me. In fact, no one reached out and grabbed me either, which could have been a good or bad thing either way. 

I headed into Coles to grocery shop having given up trying to find something I wanted for my birthday. I must be getting to the stage where I could class myself as 'the man who wants for nothing'. How sad is that?

Coles... What is it with Coles? 

They used to be the premier grocery chain in this country and now they are simply the pits. Grubby, narrow and an oversupply of disinterested staff. The girl who checked me out was South African and she moved with the haste and grace a dead elephant. (African - not Indian of course). 

Half of my shopping is usually tins of cat food and as she was putting the 40 or so tins through, I did a quick timing exercise on her and came to the conclusion that she was at least 4 times slower than the most efficient of checkout chicks that you so rarely encounter. This girl was clearly academically challenged, though I dare she would have received a solid 'A' with distinction for Lethargy, were it ever one of her chosen subjects.

Regardless of her mental prowess, even the most simple of simpletons could respond to a prompt for greater productivity than this girl displayed. This is the problem with Coles. It is tired and poorly managed ,and you just have to hope that the new owners of Coles (Wesfarmers) can breathe some new life into the meaning of 'service'.

Adding to the displeasure of being held captive by the Afrikaan, was the fact that behind me was one of those charming mothers, complete with three young children who have never learned (and doubtless ever will from their parents) what the meaning of the word 'discipline' is. One of her brat offspring only stopped whacking me with the chrome metal gate after I ensured that it sprung back and clobbered him. 

I'm sure it is all my own fault for daring to venture out at all during the six week school break. 

On returning to the car park, I noticed a parking sign and I am curious. Each of the parking signs was the same. There is a two hour limit and a sign of an orange Kangaroo above it . What does it all mean?

Grey and red kangaroos can park without any time limit? Maybe they can't park at all?
Humans can park here, but only if they are accompanied by an orange Kangaroo and even then, only for two hours?

I'm confused. I just hope that Jen, (the South African checkout chick) doesn't have to park there, or should would take four hours each day determining whether she should alight from the car.